Tompkins Town Hall: Safeguarding Youth Mental Health

America is experiencing a youth mental health and suicide crisis, as kids grow up in a world that is increasingly stressful and scary for them, according to Tiffany Bloss, executive director of the Suicide Prevention & Crisis Service of Tompkins County.

Tiffany Bloss speaks at youth mental health town hall

Bloss said that a quarter of the young people who die in the United States today take their own lives. She said the causes of suicide are complex, but pointed to stress factors such as the Covid-19 pandemic, academic pressures, addictive social media, poor family relationships, and financial anxiety.

“They are trying to navigate so many things in their world, and it is a scary place to be right now. And, with social media, there is no escape,” she said.

Bloss was a featured speaker at “Youth Mental Health & Wellness,” a community town hall hosted by the Tompkins County Suicide Prevention Coalition at the Tompkins County Public Library on October 5.

Bloss said that suicide is preventable, and emphasized the importance of normalizing discussions about mental health and being aware of warning signs that could be indicators of suicidal thoughts.

“We talk about our physical health all the time. We don’t ask about mental health. If your gut tells you that something is kind of going on for your youth, you’ve really got to ask them questions about suicide and see what we can do and open up that conversation,” she said.

Some of the warning signs Bloss described were not going out with friends anymore, failed relationships, slipping grades, changes in sleep patterns, excessive agitation or anger, and talking about dying by suicide.

She said that her agency and others in Tompkins County offer support services to address mental health challenges and emotional crises. She said that when people have serious concerns about themselves or someone else, it is wise to call 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

Melanie Little, director of Education and Youth Services at the Mental Health Association of Tompkins County, spoke about the importance of recognizing risk factors can make youth more vulnerable to developing a mental health disorder.

Melanie Little provides “Mental Health 101”

Among the risk factors are trauma, substance abuse, social marginalization, lack of supportive relationships, a physical illness or disability, and bullying, she said. She said mental disorders are increasingly common in youth, with 1 in 3 teens experiencing anxiety, 1 in 5 major depression, and 1 in 5 eating disorders.

Little emphasized the need to avoid perpetuating stigma around mental health. She listed some common examples of stigmatizing language that can be harmful to young people struggling with a disorder.

“Everyone has anxiety. Some people are just stronger than you are.”

“Therapy and medications are just scams. You don’t need them.”

“What do you mean you can’t get out of bed? It’s not like your legs aren’t working.”

“Kids can’t have mental illness. What have they got to worry about in life?”

“All women are a bit bipolar.”

Pat Breux, former director of School and Youth Initiatives at the Suicide Prevention Center of New York, discussed the vital role that schools play in preventing youth suicide.

She said that the 2024 National Strategy for Suicide Prevention as well as New York State policy highlight schools as important settings for upstream prevention through community education as well as intervention with individuals at risk of suicide.

“We take an approach that we call ‘confident, connected, caring school communities.’ What that means is everyone has a role to play. Everyone is challenged to have the competencies to notice, and know where, when, and how to access help for somebody when somebody’s in need,” she said.

Breux said schools can help educate parents about mental health starting when the children enter kindergarten. “We need to start having those conversations and preparing parents for the idea that mental health crises are pretty common by the time kids get into middle school or high school. And you need to be able to recognize that early and know how to get help for your kid,” she said.

In New York State last year, Breux said, more 5,000 children went to the emergency department for self-injurious behavior.

“About 2,000 of those kids ended up hospitalized. Where did the other 3,000 end up the next morning? Back in school. Were they fixed? No. There are kids who are going to struggle with suicidality who need access to education. They need to be able to move through life with that. How do we create the environment that those kids can be okay and make sure that we’re having some kind of eyes on them and they have access to the supports that they need at the level that they need?”

Breux distributed copies of “A Guide for Suicide Prevention for New York Schools,” a booklet prepared by the Suicide Prevention Center of New York that provides information for training school staff and educating parents as well as targeted and individualized interventions against suicide risk.

Town Hall organized by the Tompkins County Suicide Prevention Coalition

Other speakers at the town hall included Shawn Goodman, a psychologist in the Ithaca Central School District; Nicole Roulstin, Contact Center Manager for 211 Tompkins/Cortland; a student at Tompkins Cortland Community College; and Randy Brown, a member of the Tompkins County Legislature.

Goodman, an author of young adult fiction and nonficton, gave remarks about his latest book, “How to Survive Your Parents: A Teen’s Guide to Thriving in a Difficult Family,” published in September by Penguin Random House LLC.

Goodman said several things inspired him to write the self-help manual. He said that he noticed that some people his age were still struggling with their childhood issues. And while he found books to help adults heal their issues, he couldn’t find any books for kids to help them before they became adults themselves.

“And I had kids coming in essentially asking for that, saying ‘This is going on with my dad. This is going on with my mom. I want my relationship to be better. How do I do that?’”

Goodman said his favorite strategy for living in a difficult family is to learn how to manage the situation, not the relationship.

“Many kids are holding the entire relationship and feeling responsibility for it. I tell kids it’s not your job to change your parents’ behavior. And even if it were your job, it’s mission impossible. So instead, just try and manage each situation. Throughout the book, if kids stick with it, I’m really hoping that they’re going to be building confidence in navigating difficult situations and improve their outcomes, one moment at a time,” he said.

The Tompkins Cortland Community College student shared a personal story of a suicidal crisis that began before she turned 11. She said that while she grew up in a supportive family, an attentive youth pastor and later a therapist played crucial roles in guiding her on a path to healing. “Sometimes talking to parents can be really challenging especially for a middle schooler,” she said.

The student noted that that while she is feeling fantastic and is enjoying college today, speaking about her ordeal is still difficult. She said she agreed to speak about it publicly for the first time at the town hall because “I thought it was a good idea to bring awareness.”

In her presentation, Roulstin provided an overview of how the 2-1-1 hotline can help Tompkins residents access a multitude of community services for support, including food, housing, transportation, health and mental health, utilities, legal aid, veteran needs, job listings, and tax assistance. She said the hotline uses a database with over 1,600 local, state, and federal resources.

Tompkins County Legislator Randy Brown: “The issue of our time”

Brown provided the town hall’s welcome remarks, saying “I think mental health and wellness is the issue of our time, more important than any other issue that I can think of. When I ran for the legislature a few years ago, it was the number one issue for me and still is. I think that there’s more that we can do as a county.”

The Tompkins County Suicide Prevention Coalition is comprised of health agencies, community organizations, and individual members who share a determination to prevent suicide deaths in our community. It is a collective of volunteers that strives for diverse and inclusive representation and encourages collaboration for achieving goals.

If you or someone you know feels the need to speak with a mental health professional, you can call or text the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 9-8-8, or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741.

Statement from The Sophie Fund

Friends of The Sophie Fund have called to our attention that a political rally held at the Bernie Milton Pavilion in the Ithaca Commons on Sunday October 15 featured a speaker expressing exhilaration over the recent atrocities against Israeli citizens. Some viral images from the rally showed the banner of The Sophie Fund affixed across the Pavilion. We would like to make it clear that this banner was for our annual cupcake contest event held the day before, on Saturday October 14. The banner, which had nothing to do with the political rally, was erected on Friday and is due to be taken down this week when workers return and remove it. The Sophie Fund is a nonprofit community mental health advocacy organization in Tompkins County, NY that promotes youth well-being, suicide prevention, anti-bullying, sexual assault prevention, empathy, and kindness, and celebrates the joys of life. We are not a political organization and there was no political content in our cupcake contest, which is held at the Bernie Milton Pavilion every October. Supporting and attending our event on Saturday were nine local mental health organizations and five Cornell University student organizations. The contest raised funds for an Ithaca mental health clinic serving families and children. We were not informed that a political rally would take place at the Pavilion on the following day and deeply regret any mistaken association with it due to the unrelated juxtaposition of the banner. The Sophie Fund condemns the murder of Israeli civilians as well as the repugnant remarks made at the Sunday rally.

Scene from 8th Annual Ithaca Cupcake Baking Contest, October 14, 2023

Sign Up to Help Prevent Suicide

The vision of the suicide prevention community is a world free from suicide loss—a world where no one experiences the pain of a co-worker, friend, or family member taking their own life. We can all play a part toward advancing this vision.

LivingWorks ASIST is a leading suicide intervention training program, whose mission is to make that better world possible through high-quality training programs that empower everyone to make a difference, no matter who they are or what they do.

Suicide Prevention & Crisis Service is proud to be hosting a free LivingWorks ASIST workshop in Ithaca on June 27-28 from 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.

The face-to-face workshop features powerful audiovisuals, discussions, and simulations. Participants learn how to prevent suicide by recognizing signs, providing a skilled intervention, and developing a safety plan to keep someone alive. Studies show that ASIST participants gain the confidence to help save a life.

More than 30 peer-reviewed studies and government reports on LivingWorks ASIST have found that the training:

  • Improves skills and readiness.
  • Is safe for trainees, with no adverse effects from training.
  • Increases hope and reduces suicidality through interventions.
  • Increases general counseling and listening skills.
  • Saves lives and costs, yielding a return on investment of up to 50:1.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death among Americans aged 10-34. Over the past five years, Tompkins County has averaged 12 suicide deaths per year. An estimated 300 people in our community may attempt suicide every year. Another 1,600 parents, children, siblings, friends, and spouses may be impacted by resulting psychological, spiritual, and/or financial loss.

While rates for other causes of death have remained steady or declined, the U.S. suicide rate increased 35.2% from 1999 to 2018.  At any given time, one in 25 people is thinking about suicide to some degree.

LivingWorks ASIST is trusted by professionals yet learnable by anyone, Those who go through the workshop make their communities safer from suicide by providing life-saving interventions.

Please help us make our community suicide-safer.

HOW TO REGISTER:

To register, contact SPCS Executive Director Tiffany Bloss at blosst@ithacacrisis.org. Registration is free of charge. The workshop takes place June 27-28 at the Conference Center, South Hill Business Campus, 950 Danby Road, Ithaca. Light breakfast, lunch, and snacks are provided.

—By Tiffany Bloss

Tiffany Bloss is the executive director of Suicide Prevention & Crisis Service in Ithaca

Know Your Mental Health Resources

May is Mental Health Awareness Month! Take the time to know what mental health support resources are available if you live in Tompkins County. Resources are helpful to those experiencing mental health disorders, as well as to their families and friends. If you are at all concerned about your mental health, or about a loved one or someone you know, stay educated about mental health and how to get help. You may even save a life.

DOWNLOAD My Mental Health Resources (Tompkins County)

Meet Ithaca’s Mr. Kindness

To paraphrase his wife Jacque, Darrell Harrington is Ithaca’s Mr. Kindness. He is certainly a man with a big heart—actually, hundreds of them. Harrington is the one who came up with Be Kind Ithaca, whose bright red “Be Kind” hearts adorn lawns and porches throughout Tompkins County and beyond.

Darrell Harrington featured in a Spectrum News 1 segment in 2021

“Spreading kindness and paying it forward,” as Harrington puts it, is Be Kind Ithaca’s mission.

It started with the outbreak of the Covid-19 pandemic and the related lockdowns in March 2020. Harrington became concerned about the spike in anxiety that he was witnessing in the world around him. Jacque, a nursing student he describes as “just solid,” blew through two red lights in Ithaca one day. “There was this fear, this panic,” Harrington recalled. “The whole world was scared. Our age hasn’t been through something like this.”

Harrington, 48, a lifelong musician who is originally from Groton, has a long history with anxiety disorder. He still lives with some of the trauma he developed from being bullied as a kid with “buck teeth” and “coke-bottle eyeglasses.” After seeing a lot of stressed folks arguing on social media, Harrington did something he never imagined he could do.

He decided to publish a post about his personal experience with anxiety, and invited people to reach out to him if they wanted to talk about their own anxiety with someone. He says he was shocked to discover all the positive responses, including from people he had been afraid would “judge” him.

Harrington wanted to do more. Having recently started a small construction business, he knows his way around a tool shed. Drawing from his mother’s enjoyment of crafting, he used some scrap wood to create a red heart standing six feet high and four feet wide painted with the words “Be Kind.” Just before Easter that year, he trimmed the giant heart with colorful lights and planted it on the edge of his property along a busy road on Ithaca’s South Hill. “I’m just gonna put that there, if it can help someone decompress their stress, their anger, or just make them smile,” Harrington recalled.

Maria Salino, the owner of the nearby Dolce Delight bakery, saw Harrington’s heart and asked he if would make her one, too. Then at her request, Harrington went back to his basement work shop to saw, sand, drill, and paint away and produce 10 more hearts for her friends. He made a few extras and offered them to his own friends on social media, who scooped them up. Harrington reckons that he gave away the first few hundred hearts, but then with lumber prices rising he reluctantly started charging for them basically at cost so he wouldn’t go in the hole financially.

The orders kept coming in. With an extra hand in the work shop from his brother Dale, Harrington began offering two sizes, two by two feet and a miniature, for $27 and $14, respectively. The hearts are in plain site outside countless homes locally, but he has now shipped the Be Kind placards to nearly every state (and documented on Be Kind Ithaca’s Facebook page). Besides the hearts he constructs by hand, Harrington has created a line of Be Kind merch with everything from key chains and employee badge clips to t-shirts and fridge and car bumper magnets.

Nor has Harrington stopped at symbolic expressions of kindness. Inspired by Ronald McDonald House Charities, Be Kind Ithaca has begun donating a portion of its proceeds to the community. It has raised funds for T-Burg Takes on Pediatric Cancer, the Mickey Gallagher Memorial Scholarship Fund, the SPCA of Tompkins County, and The Lost Dogs of the Finger Lakes. Harrington has also sent donations to help victims of severe weather incidents in Texas and Kentucky.

(Full disclosure: Be Kind Ithaca recently made a donation to The Sophie Fund from its sales of Christmas ornaments, hand crafted by Harrington’s retired parents.)

Be Kind’s mission also involves undertaking random acts of kindness. For example, after hearing that many people had succumbed to Covid-19 at an Ithaca area nursing home, Harrington sprung into action by delivering gift bags to all its custodial workers to thank them for their selfless service. Partly supported by a donor, the bags were stuffed with Be Kind key chains, Dolce Delight gift cards, and New York lottery tickets.

Sometimes when Harrington encounters a total stranger who looks overwhelmed, he’ll pull out and present them with a Be Kind sticker. “You just see them smile,” he said.

To some, Harrington may seem like an unlikely ambassador of kindness. They would be wrong. For 30 years—since becoming a teenage fan of Guns N’ Roses—he has played bass guitar in heavy metal and rock bands, like Bone Jar and The New York Rock. With dreadlocks and tattoos up and down his left arm, he toured the country and played venues including CBGB in New York and Whiskey a Go Go in LA. Back home, he augmented his income bartending, and managed The Haunt, Ithaca’s largest band venue.

Through his rough and tumble music career and his mental health struggles, Harrington maintained a belief in the goodness of his fellow men and women. “For every bad person you hear about, there’re nine other amazing and kind people,” he said.

Darrell Harrington himself is one of those amazing and kind people.

NOTE: Follow Be Kind Ithaca on Facebook and Instagram, or email darrelljharrington@gmail.com, to order Be Kind products.